A friend shares about another friend’s illness, a breakup or the rude cashier. You will feel something. Even if you feel nothing, you’re feeling nothing. If you’re numb and disconnected from your body, you won’t feel anything. If your heart is open, Perhaps there is a sinking feeling in your gut. Or maybe your head suddenly feels confused with a slight spinning sensation. You have just taken on some bad news.
Here are 3 ways you may react:
The Energetic Dump: I call a few friends and blow off steam. If so, you are now dissipating the energy, so you don’t have to feel it anymore. But, now you have passed it on to your friends. Probably not the gift they wanted to receive from you.
I’m not saying don’t call your friends. But, there is a way to be conscious about your life and also a way to shift patterns that aren’t serving your evolution. Are you just spreading negativity or do you really want some compassion and insight from your friend? Before you call your friends, give yourself a chance to sit with the news and see if you can discover why it is bothering you.
Maybe you heard that John’s boss criticized his work. If this really affects you, then it is more about you than John. Perhaps you feel a lack of appreciation at your own job or it reminds you of your father criticizing your school grades. If you jump on the phone quick, you may miss out on the deeper meaning of your upset.
The Numb Out: I distract myself with TV, gaming, shopping or food. When you’re overwhelmed, you’ll turn to comfort. Something is too much to feel. Instead you engage in something that takes you up into your head and away from your heart.
Society sends the message to avoid feelings at all cost. One of the blessings of being human is to feel. If you give yourself time to open up to the discomfort or pain, emotions may actually transform in less than 2 minutes. It’s the resistance to feeling that builds the energy and the emotion into something intolerable. Return your emotions to their fluid state so they can flow out of you.
The Bottomless Pit: I keep thinking about it until I am overwhelmed and then become hopeless about the situation. This is really a difficult place to be as hopelessness causes inertia, which can cause depression.
Know your tolerance. If you resonate with the bottomless pit, then limit exposure to the news and to draining people. Recognize that you are heading toward the pit, and firmly decide to shift out of it. You’re probably very compassionate by nature, which is a beautiful gift. No one is helped by another person’s hopelessness. Knowing that this is your tendency will allow you to catch yourself before you fall into the pit.
A Healthier Option – Don’t allow yourself to be swamped by negativity. When you speak to someone, feel the space between you. If you are moved by something they share, then allow your heart to feel it. If you sense negative vibes, feel the “NO” in your body and keep your boundary up. Don’t let the negativity seep into your system. You are on your way to energetic health!